Saturday, October 06, 2007

Friendship.

I was annoying when I was young.

In fact I think I'll rephrase that, I was very annoying when I was young.

The person I annoyed most was my sister Sam. The thing was that I adored her, wanted to be like her and be with her all the time only she was three years, five months and fifteen days older than me so once she went to secondary school at the age of 11 she didn't want a snotty little sister hanging around. Anything Sam did I wanted to do, anything she wore I wanted to wear and that didn't include wearing her cast offs when they were three years out of date *shudders, remembering grey pleated skirt*.

The thing I envied most about Sam was her close group of friends when she was in sixth form (16-18 years). This was a time when I was having friend issues, surely you remember the bitchiness of young teenage girls, so I was insanely jealous of Sam and her friends and would spend as much of my time as I could annoying the hell out of them. Yet they were so nice to me. Vicky was my patrol leader in guides (I lasted two weeks in Sam's patrol but it was most definitely not a match made in heaven), Rachel was always thoughtful and kind, she listened to me, Karen was just plain cool and made me laugh and Sheena, who I remember laughing a lot, was Sam's closest friend, they were just the best buddies.

The odd time, this group of friends would allow me into their gang. When Sam was 18 I was allowed to go to a nightclub with them to celebrate (although I was collected at midnight), I joined them for a picnic to celebrate her birthday and occasionally I'd sit and sip tea as they chatted. When I was in Bristol seeing Sam a few weeks ago we went out to dinner with some of Sam's friends. It was great to see them all, they look and sound the same and we reminisced although they were all kind enough to refrain from mentioning what a pain I used to be.

Sadly Sheena wasn't there because she was very ill and I've just heard the news that she passed away last night in her sleep. When I think of her I'll always remember the true meaning of friendship and how Sam, Sheena, Vicky, Karen and Rachel taught me about being a good friend.

43 comments:

hellojed said...

A great tribute Beccy.

Steffi said...

Very nice post and great tribute,Beccy!I enjoyed to read it!Have a nice weekend!

Willowtree said...

That's so sad, and so totally unnecessary.

la bellina mammina said...

I am older than my sister, 3 years and 4 months and I remember her wanting to tag along all the time :-) I'm sorry to hear about Sheena.

frannie said...

so, so sad.

I knew Sheena had been sick and was really hoping that wasn't where this post was going.

I am so sorry for your family's loss. I know that you were all close to Sheema-- especially Sam.

Misslionheart♥ said...

Lovely post, Becci.

Sad is the only word to describe why a person is taken, especially so young...

I'm so sorry.

Sam said...

o went to bed sobbing my heart out last night. I was trying to be strong this morning but the first thing I do is read your blog and now I have dissolved into tears again. That was such a beautiful post beccy. Even as an older sister there is always something new to learn and I think I learned something new today. I am going to write a post about Sheena but I think it will take a few days.

I love you. thank you.

Marmite Breath said...

Sheena must have left a great imprint on a lot of people--not just you. I hope that gives you comfort.

Debbie said...

A very sad ending to a wonderful story about friendship. I'm sorry for you and your family's loss.

her indoors said...

how very sad i am so very sorry for you, your sister and for sheena's family x

Alix said...

I'm so sorry, she sounds like a very special person, you wrote a lovely tribute to her

john.g. said...

All of the above, xx

mjd said...

I am sorry to hear about the death of your friend, Sheena.

I have two sisters, one seven years older than me and one 3 years than me. I was probably a bigger pain to the one closer to my age. The other sister looked at me as her baby sister.

Blue Momma said...

I'm so sorry you and your sis lost your friend.

Sounds like you've got some great memories, though, so she'll always be with you.

~hugs~ from across the pond

cookiecrumb said...

I'm so very sorry about all of you losing Sheena, especially Sam.
Nice writeup, Beccy. Loving.

Beckie said...

That is very sad.
You did a nice job with the post.

Heather J said...

What a wonderful memory of her you have posted. I am so sorry she passed away.

PS. I saw pleated skirts today while shopping...one of them was grey! Just thought I'd share that with you :)

Lisa said...

I'm so sorry to hear about Sheena, I remember the previous posts from you and your Mom, and it sounds like she was more a member of the family than a friend to Sam.
Lovely tribute.

my4kids said...

I'm sorry to hear about Sheena. I remember your mom posting about here several months ago.

Fatemeh said...

this is so sweet beccy.

now, more than ever before, i hope to meet you very soon!

Karmyn R said...

That is too sad about Sheena. She must have been quite young.

I was the oldest sister...but my sisters were 7 and 10 years younger, so I didn't have to worry as much about tag-alonging.

Deborah said...

What a touching and thoughtful post Beccy. I am so sorry about your friend.

Pamela said...

always the laughter that is
remembered so sweetly.


We all need to laugh more.

Christine said...

Beccy, I am so sorry to hear about your friend, Sheena. What a beautiful tribute to her and her friendship. Those are some very special memories (annoying, but special).

Having three daughters,( I know what you mean) I can tell Marissa the older one, and Lindsay the baby get along fine, but Katelyn in the middle somehow annoys both of them and the baby is jealous of her. It's nice to hear that you all are such lovely friends.

Tiger Lamb Girl said...

I'm so sorry to hear about your friend. What lovely memories, even if bittersweet now. xo

Arkansas Songbird said...

Oh, how sad. I am sorry to hear of your friends' death.

Kila said...

Thanks for sharing her with us. Sorry she left you all so soon.

Emma in Canada said...

Beccy, what a lovely tribute to Sheena and friendship. If I recall correctly from your mum's blog, Sam was able to visit with her and I hope that brings her some comfort.

swampy said...

I am so sorry. What a lovely tribute to Sheena.

Carla said...

Sorry to hear about Sheena. You have painted very beautiful memories of her.

Sally Lomax said...

When I started to read this post, I had no idea about how it was going to end. I loved your description of you as the annoying little sister. I could relate to it, as I too was someone's - two ones' - annoying little sister....

And then I cried at the end. Brilliantly told Beccy. But I am so sad for you all.

Amy W said...

Sorry about Sheena...great tribute to your friend.

Catwoman said...

How terribly sad. I can just imagine how much you all miss her. Very well written, Becky.

shauna said...

It has been so sad -- but so beautiful -- to read what you and Sam and your mum said about Sheena. So beautiful. (By the way, I thought my little brother was annoying at the time, but he and I and Sharon are all still friends, nearly 25 years later.)

Thank you for sharing.

alissa said...

I'm so sorry to hear Sheena past... my deepest sympathies to you & your sister.

dawn said...

Sorry to hear of your loss. Sheena sounds like a wonderful person.

headless chicken said...

What a lovely tribute to Sheena.
I'm sure she would want you to continue to remember the good times you all had together.
I have an older sister but none of us have had any contact with her for many years.
I also have a younger brother who is a very respectable 'grown-up' now but was once the most embarassing little brother on the planet!

gawilli said...

There's nothing so strong as a circle of friends. And what better way to remember someone.

gawilli said...

There's nothing so strong as a circle of friends. And what better way to remember someone.

Kaytabug said...

I'm so sorry. She sounds like she was family you got to choose...
"What we have once enjoyed we can never lose. All that we love deeply becomes a part of us." -Helen Keller
My heart goes out to Sheena's family and yours.

M@ said...

This is all messed up, dude. There's entirely too much tea-drinking going on here.

Rachel said...

What a nice tribute. Sorry to hear about her passing.

enidd said...

enidd has come here last, after reading sam's account and chris's - and the tears are in her eyes. a lovely tribute to friendship, beccy.