Tuesday, September 11, 2007

Farewell

I was rather enjoying reading this weeks Fun Monday posts and hearing about all the good deeds people were doing until I got to one post which upset me. I am sure that I am over reacting but I took it so personally that I welled up and now feel both very upset and sick. I know it doesn't really matter to most people how I feel, I know that I have a tendency to take things too personally and I know I will get over it. One thing is certain and that is that Fun Mondays will no longer be fun so I'm officially retiring. I'm sure I'll miss it, it always gave me something to post about on a Monday and I've been with it from the start (I think I only missed one or two when I was on holiday) but life will move on and I'm only a small fish in the big sea of Fun Mondays so I won't be missed.



41 comments:

Amy W said...

First off, I take things personally too. And it does matter how you feel...

What in the world happened??

Asha said...

Aw!! Hugs to you Beccy, you are a sensitive soul!:))
No more Fun Mondays!
Oh well.. I like Witty Wednesdays better anyway!!:))

Lisa said...

Beccy, I'm so sorry that something upset you so much, you've obviously had a hard time with it and given some thought to giving up Fun Mondays.
HOW we feel is sometimes more important to each of us than WHY, so I respect that.
I will still be a regular visitor, never fear, you can't get rid of me that easily! :)

la bellina mammina said...

Hi Beccy
What happened?Like Amy said, it does matter how you feel. I'm sorry you're feeling upset.

hellojed said...

Sorry to hear that Beccy, I enjoyed being a lurker on Fun Mondays...but blogging should be a pleasure, so I think you're right to retire. I hope you don't retire from the blogosphere completely though - I'll miss you!

nikki said...

I feel terrible! I chose this FM theme to make everyone feel all squishy inside. I'm sorry for what happened.

dawn said...

I am only presuming what happened, based on what I just read on another blog, and I hope you will reconsider in time. I was very saddened by what I read, and I had no prior clue to what was happening and was not personally involved. I think you are right to be effected by this loss, and it will take a lot of time to heal. I hope that in time you will find joy in Fun Monday's again. It will be all around you. If this is your way of honouring the person, that is awesome also. You have a great heart.

lisa's chaos said...

It does matter, you do matter and I will still be here. I'm sorry for the bad monday.

Shama-Lama Mama said...

Oh Beccy -
I have to tell people that I am the reason that Beccy wants to retire.

I am new to Fun Monday and as my good deed, I made a new logo for the group. I was insensitive to the maker of the original who turned out to be Beccy's teen grandson, not a "nice man, no longer with the group" as I had been told. I called the original logo "too tiny for me, and needed a little Oooomph".

I offered the new logo I had made as an option to whomever wished to use it.

Beccy, I feel just awful. I feel it would rather just pull my logo, and ask everyone to continue with the original than have an original member of the crew retire because of my insensitivity. Would that make it better?

Being the new member, I would rather just not participate myself than have you pull out.

Please, please, reconsider. I just love playing with photoshop, and thought this would be a fun little project. I never considered other's feelings and I apologize. I will post this apology over at my fun monday post, too.

Shama-Lama Mama said...

Beccy, I meant to say that it was created by your son, not your grandson. I got your name confused with your Mom who posted to my comments yesterday. Again, my apologies.

Sam said...

Of course you would be missed. I don't think it was intended as a personal insult or anything. I think you should stick with it. You could also start something else that you ahve ownership of instead. Maybe it's time for a change anyway?

I have seen things like this happen many times in the food blogosphere too and it is important that it rarely happens out of malice, but out of ignorance for netiquette.

Perhaps a future Fun Monday could be to offer a redesign competition for the Fun Monday Logo and Dillon could be invited to come up with a new design alongside everyone else and then it could go to a vote - that would certainly be democratic.

In terms of netiquette - the original instigator of Fun Monday - whoever that is? Would be considered its owner and the person who makes such decisions. I think they should have been notified or asked at the time the logo was first introduced and then a request should have been made to them if it was to be changed.

But that's just my opinion. I have survived a few weblog tussles in my time. They can really hurt for a while and then you'll move on and forget it.

Love you!

sam x

Beccy said...

Thank you to everyone for their nice comments and to those who emailed me as well. I am much calmer now and feel that I probably did over react. I really appreciated the comment left by shama lama mama and send the following response to her:

Firstly I want to say that I really appreciate your comment. My comment on your blog and my post was a gut reaction to your Fun Monday post. On reflection maybe I should have said nothing and retired gracefully but I know how much work Dillon (my son) put into designing various logos, choosing which one he wanted us to use and how proud he was to see his logo on screen. In fact only recently he was pleased to see that it was still being used although he had a few words with his Grandma for "graffiti-ing her logo"! I am not sure where you got your information about the very nice man making the logo but if I remember correctly he coined the Fun Monday phrase and was the first to use the new logo when I posted it on my blog.

I have no objection to the new logo, times change, people move on and all that and from all the comments you got people obviously prefer your logo, we live in a free country and I totally believe in freedom of choice. Please don't pull your logo and please don't pull out of Fun Monday participation. I have been participating in a fun filled 32 weeks of Fun Monday and feel I need a rest, that is my choice and I am happy about it. I certainly don't want to stop others from participating lest of all you. I know what you did was with good intentions and I appreciate that. I am calm now and hold no hard feelings.

Sam from what you say I was wrong in first devising the Fun Monday logo, luckily the man who started the Fun Monday theme seemed to like the logo but I think I need to learn some netiquette.

frannie said...

omg! you poor thing! I am so sorry that something upset you. I know how much you enjoy fun monday's so I know that you must really be upset.

thinking of you

Sam said...

Beccy - if that man approved of it at the time - then you were good to go I think.

Now the art director in me speaks - the new logo has really bad aliasing artifacts on the text and it should probably be fixed before being populated - if they decide to use it.

Shama-Lama Mama said...

Beccy,
I don't think Sam meant to imply that YOU needed to learn netiquette, but (and rightly so) that *I* should have considered using better netiquette. The founder of FM obviously was thrilled to have a logo and adopted Dillon's happily.

I can only imagine how thrilled and proud you were to see it popping up on other people's pages as well. I should have thought of that.

I wish I had left well enough alone. I LOVE playing around with photoshop and created the thing for my own use and pleasure. Then, when I realized FM had rolled around after two weeks, and I hadn't done my intended good deed, on a WHIM I decided to just share the logo out (that I had created a good two weeks earlier for fun) and call THAT my good deed.

That whim is why I did not think to even ASK the group if they wanted the dang thing, or consider if it would bother anyone to just throw one out there. I envisioned everyone using whichever they wished. Some people use none. It didn't occur to me that it might become "the official one" or anything.

Oh, I am just rambling now... I just wanted to say that I think Sam rightly said that it was ME who was being a little insensitive, not you.

Beccy said...

Sam, I don't understand you with your art director's hat on but I'll believe you!

Shama-lama mama I'm laughing now because I did the same as you 29 weeks ago, I took it apon myself to introduce the logo, not to make it official or anything just because I was new(ish) to blogging and thought it would be fun. Hey prehaps we need to go to netiquette school together!

Shama-Lama Mama said...

I hope you will reconsider retiring over this. You say after 32 straight weeks you "need a break" but from other people's comments it sounds like it means a lot to you.

As the newbie to the group, I would be happy to bow out if it would make you stay.

Please?

Beccy said...

Please don't bow out, I really don't want that. Maybe if a great topic comes up I'll be back but I'm really happy with my decision who knows maybe I might have made the same decision anyway without all this.

my4kids said...

Just to to put in my 2 cents I wanted to let you know that I have always loved Dillons logo since it goes so well with my blog design!
I'm sad you aren't going to participate anymore I love you fun monday posts!

john.g. said...

I'm sticking with the original, copyright "DILLON"!

Julie said...

I'm sorry you feel hurt and upset. Of course I"m wondering what happened but you are certainly entitled to feel however you do. I always enjoyed reading your Fun Monday posts.

Pamela said...

ô¿ô

appears to be just a little enthusiasm that was not meant to be hurtful.

I'm happy to stick with the green one. Especially since I know now your son designed it. I missed a couple of fun mondays after the original (Willowtree and Vicki were the two that dreamed it up)_
... so I thought The Electronic Firefly had introduced it for some odd reason.

It wouldn't be the same without you beccy!!!!

And please continue to participate shamma lama mama.

Sally Lomax said...

Oh what a tangled web we weave!

Just make sure that you stay blogging though Beccy!

Glad you are happy again...

Lil Mouse (Jill) said...

sorry you're not playing any more. hopefully you'll take heart to a newbie just trying to fit in. it wasn't her intent to harm.

Willowtree said...

Just a brief history lesson for those who may be interested.

Vicki came up with the idea of how it could be fun to take a peek into people's lives, but didn't think anyone else would be interested.

I told her would be a great idea, and after a series of emails back and forth, we decided on a topic and a date and she hosted the first one.

Initially it was only going to be a one off, but it was so successful that another one was proposed for the next week by Eric (the very nice man).

It was also Eric who came up with the name, but he only ever did a few then disappeared. Some time later Vicki ceased to participate, although I did manage to get her back for one I was hosting a little while ago.

The logo appeared after a couple of weeks and was taken up pretty quickly despite nothing ever being said about it or it's origins (which is why nobody knew its history) and has been the symbol ever since.

I understand that feelings can run high on both sides, it is after all the flag we have had since the start.

I just hope that everyone cools off and does what they decide to do after thinking it over calmly, and that no-one quits over this, although I appreciate that it's hard to have the same feelings once the gloss has been taken off.

If I could just express a personal opinion here, FunMonday was always meant to be a 'show and tell' type of thing, and while occasionally some unusual topics have been put forward, it's really just a peek into someone else's life (preferably with pictures). Lately we seem to be getting further and further away from that.

Karmyn R said...

I don't have anything to add except - let's all eat chocolate. That usually helps me.

laurie said...

beccy, i am so sorry you had a bad experience. it's so easy for words on a page to hurt--they carry so much power, cut off as they are from inflection and facial expression and everything else that makes conversation easily interpreted.

just know that you are not a small fish, at least not in my bloglines pond, and if you ever stop blogging i will miss you very much.

plus you should be getting a package from me very soon. hope they didn't melt en route.

laurie'

Heather J said...

Whoa, a mini drama unveiled in the form of blog comments! I am glad you both got it worked out. Maybe netiquitte school will give you some bonding time and you will be future best friends!

Ok. Sorry for the silly comment. I am just happy that you aren't mad anymore. And I hope that you will return to fun monday before too long! (PS, I never knew Dillon created that logo, it's awesome!)

Kila said...

I hope you'll still participate, and post in general. I always enjoy your entries.

WT, good job. It would be nice for Fun Monday to go back to being a show and tell.

I like the original flag.

(((HUGS)))

Steffi said...

I agree with amy w and I take things personally too and I know how you feel.
But sorry,maybe is my english too bad - what´s happend?Iunderstand no more Fun Mondays with you. I know Dillon designed the FM-Logo and it was really good!Is it stolen and copy at other blogs?

I receive often bad anonymos comments(no publish) and they writing bad things about my blog ...and some peoples makes than the same things like me when they seen new things in my blog!That´s terrible and I know which person did it...
Hugs to you,Beccy and you are so a friendly and nice and I can understand you!

Deborah said...

Cyberhugs Beccy! Hope you reconsider... I love reading your posts. Hang in there! ;-)

Bethany said...

I'll miss you on Mondays!

I agree with WT, I like the peek into other people's lives.

I also agree with Karmyn- let's have chocolate!

Catwoman said...

Beccy,

I'm sending you virtual hugs! I know how easily we can get our feelings hurt as Mamas when it's something that involves our kids.

Like you, once something has been tainted, it's never the same again. Whatever you decide, I'll still be reading! :)

Christine said...

beccy, I tend to be a sensitive soul too!

As I've done over 50 Thursday Thirteens I can understand the feeling to take some time off.

I wish you'd reconsider Fun Monday's wouldn't be the same without you!

*HUGS*

Swampy said...

Beccy ! Am quickly posting from the Reno Airport and have not a clue what has happened. (But that's not unusual for me.) As soon as I arrive home, will be back to see what's going on. Until then, please stay with us. I love your Fun Monday posts. I do totally understand Blog Sensitivity. Sometimes when I don't hear from a particular BlogBud, I worry that I've offended him or her in some way and will personally e-mail them. Stay with us.

Tiggerlane said...

Well, it sounds like a NON-fun Monday happening...DANG.

I hope you choose to continue, but if you need a blogging break, I'll still come visit, no matter the day.

alisonwonderland said...

hey! i've been having a hard time the past week or so and i know that if i had experienced what you did, i would have reacted the same way. there have been lots of tears around here lately. so (like karmyn suggests) there has also been a lot of chocolate - and i'm working on feeling better ... anyway, i just wanted you to know that i empathize - and i'm sending you hugs through cyberspace. hang in there! (that's what i'm doing.)

alfaking said...

I know it should be very hard what you've experienced. I still can't figure out what really happened.

Well, it's not so important. I'd just say: Keep cool and let's learn to respect each other. Don't let the frustration overtake you.

Keep up with your posts and that's what help us maintain the blogging relationship albeit we know each other virtually.

Rachel said...

Wow, I don't read blogs for a couple of days and THIS is what I come back to! I totally understand your feelings, Beccy, and, Fun Monday or not, I will always be a reader.

Hugs.

lisa's chaos said...

Regarding the logo and Fun Monday in general. I noticed the whole goings on and wondered how to be a part of it. I kept reading a few Fun Monday's until Willowtree hosted one and said that anyone was welcome, "really?" Wow, I want in. I played on the days I wanted to, actually when my time allowed me too until I figured out I could get my post prepared sooner than Sunday evening.

I loved the little green logo, but didn't want to step on toes so I participated in FM minus the logo as I didn't know who's it was and if it was ok to use. I loaded it for the first time when I hosted for the first time, assuming it was ok to do so now that I was hosting.

I don't mind having more than one logo - but I didn't make either, however I associate the green one with FM for me and the other one doesn't fit my "style" (like I have any). Anyway, I hate to see FM go down the tubes and so far not many have signed up for the coming week's. Either way, I have all the FMer's saved in my bloglines so I can visit everyone anyways.

Enjoy your break, and maybe you'll miss us. :) Maybe we'll do Freaky Friday next?

Kaytabug said...

"Freaky Friday" LOL I'll miss you on FM's but I will keep popping in on you sporadically...cuz you know WT has me on that silly 30 minute blog reading time restriction! HA HA! J.K. about WT...I just wanted to make you smile!!! :)